Book review: Girl, Stop Apologizing: A Shame-Free Plan for Embracing and Achieving Your Goals

No lies, I was attracted to the cover of the book and I am all for women empowerment. Add to it that there is a self help book layer in it and I am hooked baby. Or was I?

Synopsis:

In Girl, Stop Apologizing, #1 New York Times bestselling author and founder of a multimillion-dollar media company, Rachel Hollis sounds a wake-up call. She knows that many women have been taught to define themselves in light of other people—whether as wife, mother, daughter, or employee—instead of learning how to own who they are and what they want. With a challenge to women everywhere to stop talking themselves out of their dreams, Hollis identifies the excuses to let go of, the behaviors to adopt, and the skills to acquire on the path to growth, confidence, and believing in yourself.  

My opinion:

This book has a title that is fucking misleading as it is fully aimed to young mothers. As a single woman, I couldn’t relate to anything and I feel like I got duped by the title and the marketing behind the book.

The book is lightly written, its easy to follow and read and is like a collection of events and souvenirs of the author. Its my first book from this author and in it she mentions several times her other books or blog. In a way, I felt like I was reading the blog of a random girl, talking about her wealthy life in LA. As the author, Rachel, mentions several times her rich people situation and problems that makes it difficult to « understand her or her struggles » as her husband was a wealthy Disney executive supporting her family.

Rachel talks in detail about her mishaps, her failures, but is always connecting them to her husband or children or her feeling as a mother. She lost me every time she did these analogies. As it feels like she couldn’t make it without them. It gives a mixed message to the readers, as it suggest that I need a man and to have a family to succeed. What the fuck? How about single working ladies? Single moms struggling?… This book feels like it was aimed to Charlotte from Sex and the city.

The few positive things I got out of her book was her extensive chapters on excuses and how to call yourself on the bullshit we tell ourselves everyday to make it. I liked how she listed the common excuses, gave practical advice on adopting great habits that set you up for success, and then acquiring the skills necessary to make growth possible. She stressed out the fact that you need 5 sacred hours a day to dedicate to your goal. And I fully agree! You need boundaries with people and to have a tight schedule to make the most of your day and to get closer to your objectives! Might seem obvious to some people, yet many adults struggle with these notions.

Its undeniable that Rachel is an inspirational speaker and knows how to motivate the shit out of people. She addressed a bit of feminism, its root in everybody’s childhood and how women see their value through various lenses. Yet in some chapters she is throwing her mom under the bus and criticizing the middle class. She is heavily into the tough love approach, some people may like it , some don’t, but in many parts of this book it feels fake and forced.

Rachel fucked up in this book by stating that addiction is easy and you can go to it if you have the strong will to stop… She also had a wrong approach to self-care and mental illness as some of the things she says could be very harmful to people and not easily digested by some. And don’t get me started on the fat shaming shit she did throughout the book: She keeps on making these comments about how losing weight is easy, and that we must stay in shape and its easy to do so via sticking to a schedule and training and dieting… BITCH PLEASE ARE YOU SERIOUS?

All in all, as a self-help book, its an average one, mostly aimed to young mothers with a certain income. I would not recommend it as a first read for this kind of literature. I expected more of her, but I will read her famous one about money and we shall see how it goes this time.